A farmer was selling his peaches door to door. He knocked on a door and a shapely 30-something woman dressed in a very sheer negligee answered the door. He raised his basket to show her the peaches and asked,
"Would you like to buy some peaches?"
She pulled the top of the negligee to one side and asked, "Are they as firm as this?"
He nodded his head and said, "Yes ma'am," as a little tear ran from his eye.
Then she pulled up the other side of her negligee asking, "Are they nice and pink like this?"
The farmer said, "Yes," and a tear softly dropped from the other eye.
Then she unbuttoned the bottom of her negligee and asked, "Are they as fuzzy as this?"
He again said, "Yes," and actually broke down crying.
She asked, "Why on earth are you crying?"
Drying his eyes, he replied, "The drought got my corn, the flood got my soy beans, a tornado leveled my barn, and now, I think I'm about to get screwed out of my peaches..."